Thursday, April 2, 2009

This Just In - OPEC Says Oil Tastes Great!

In a story in Reuters today, OPEC displayed a deep schizophrenia when talking about it's primary source of revenue.

The General Secretary for the Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries, Abdullah al-Badri, blamed industrialized nations and their factories for Global Warming, then suggested that revenues from taxing oil should go to environmental issues, but then lambasted developed nations for trying to wean off the their respective populations off of OPEC's product.

So, oil doesn't cause global warming, but coal and natural gas do?

It's enough to give you whiplash.

Even the head of Royal Dutch Shell says that maybe people should stop buying penis-replacements and just get some sort of car that works and will get them from place to place without the huge carbon footprints.

If you're going to tax petroleum products anyway, make sure you use those revenues to fund environmental needs in your country.

But God forbid that you stop buying big cars that need lots of gasoline to run.

    "It's the damned United Auto Workers' fault for GM and Ford and Chrysler all going belly-up."

    "It's the damned poor people with their sub-prime loans that have caused this banking problem."

And now, we have:

     "It's the damned industrialized nations that are causing global warming, not oil."

I'm still confused.

The implications of this are, of course, staggering. Next thing you know, the polar ice caps melting will be because polar bears have too much sex, and the Great Pacific Garbage Patch will be blamed for all the junk in the ocean. 

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